miscounted

when i was working at ada yesterday, i got bored and started flipping through my planner. it was then i realized just how long it's been since i've even spoken to the person who had been my one constant for many, many years. when i counted, i must have counted wrong because i originally thought it had been eight weeks. but it's really only been six.

can that be right? how can that be? how can it still hurt? how can it still feel like the hole in my chest is gaping? it feels like a flesh wound that won't heal. despite me trying to take care of it, it doesn't go away. how can i still feel the air sucked out of my lungs when i think about it? when will this go away? when will i stop hurting?

i'm sorry i'm such a downer lately. i'm really trying not to be. it's just really hard. still.

now playing: